cheap date..circa 1997

This was in 1997- not much as changed....

Wow, it's so interesting to see how things change overnight! Last Sunday I hung out with Zacky, the detective. He was cute, kind of short with frizzy eyebrows and pleasantly packaged, who could complain. He was pushing his forties, meanwhile living up his mid-thirties, what a stud. Rich engaged in high-tech operations for Intel- division and using that little accent for all it's worth. Well that’s Zack for you. Of course there's more!

We're hanging out and his "brother" beeps, "I have to call him, he's depressed, and he always can count on me..."he says. After his conversation he tells me that his friend, who hasn't had a drink in 12 yr. is meeting us at this biker joint called Hogs & Heifers, "Drama Queen"! "Okay, are you saying you don't enjoy my company". Of course this is a silent thought. We head out to the American Dream Machine, some bike dealership. Zacky wants to get this really expensive Harley, and of course he's going to pay in cash. He tells the salesperson that his brother "Randy" can also be called with any questions regarding the Harley. So, the guy who's going to meet us at the bar also handles his finances. Randy plays a bigger role in Zack's life wouldn't you say? "Something that kind of wants to make you go HUMMM?"

Finally we arrive at Hogs & Heifers; exactly what I thought the joint would look like. The room was gloomy, with run-down hardwood floors, and biker decor. The place was suppose to be a "landmark". It was said that Julia Roberts had gotten her face sucked once after throwing her bra up on the mantle. Ironically, only four people surrounded the only table in the house.
The wild raunchy bartender, get us a Jack & Coke for me, (got to get nice) and Dears for Zack. Yep. Yep.. I should have smelt it coming. As we get ready for our next round "Randy" strolls in. "Just in time, for the next round, "O’Doul’s, Jack & Coke and Dewars, says the short-muffin. Randy is kind of cute with serious sneaky eyes, something about him, kind of made me observe him closely, "Drama Queen": "maybe there lovers, maybe their spying on me, maybe Zack likes him and he doesn't have a clue. I mean it was just totally weird having my date hook up with someone, for a check in? Please explain why they felt they need to connect at 9:30 Sunday night? I've heard of male bounding, but come on give me a break. So, we have our drinks and make small talk. Randy is in A.A. and from what I hear is extremely rich, just thought I shared that, run wild with it! Randy heads to Jenny's, whoever the hell that is: like I really buy your story, you know you came here to see who's your competition!

3 drinks and 20 questions later we start to play pool. Have you ever imagined pool being a sensual sport? See when I drink everything kind of becomes very sexual. In other words, I get extremely horny, especially since it's been over 5 months. My hormones were connecting with the pool stick. We rub against each other a few times, gaze at each other like we were the only people in this planet, damn what Jack does to you is no joke.

We slowly start to get closer and before you know it we are embraced and sucking each other’s face! WHY WHY WHY. Easy enough, 4 jacks, and I'm all yours! What a site we were. Me in my Herman Monster boots, towering over this over-grown, bald, frizzy eyebrow detective.....

"Take it to a hotel", yells a patron. What a slut, kissing all over him! I thought only for a minute, because the crowd loved it. Sick huh? After exposing a bit of my unhide able cleavage, we get on his Harley and ride off to.... The Video Store and Chinese Food " We're having an early night? Okay so you took me out for Brunch, walked around SOHO, you take me to "HOGS & FUCKIN Heifer's and now you want to take me home?
Okay............................................................
We skipped the flick and the Chinese food, instead he gets a box of condoms, water and yes I broke-down: a pack of Newport’s. What a nervous breakdown. Here I am feeling incredibly turned on by this guy, and all I keep thinking is don't want to have sex with you. Really I don't. So we make out heavily. I turn around and doze off for a while. I wake up around 5a.m. and now I have to go it's 6a.m. What a short-lived moment.